How to learn to respect a man I was worried this topic for a long time, and the answers do not come right away. It is very difficult to understand what respect for the man when you grow up without a father, which my mother did not say anything good. Yes, and especially around men were not? especially those that can be respected. This is, incidentally, the first myth that we have, women: "Not all men can and must be respected ».
☸ The first man created woman. And if next to you a man that you "can not respect" - then it's your responsibility. I have seen many men who were transformed when their women have changed their attitude towards him.
☸ Second, we initially - a piece of God. Both I and my husband and our children, and the clerk, and the postman, and even the homeless at the station. We all originally pure and possess the same qualities as God. We just - drops, and he - the ocean.
☸ Third, we all know that any "can not" - this is, first and foremost, "do not want to." It's easier to just say that the loved one is not worthy of respect than to learn I respect him. Respect begins with adoption. I, as a woman, to be fully accepted by her husband as he is. We often hear about it, but how often do we do? It's so easy: to accept it in full:
☸ with all its shortcomings.
☸ with all his family and friends.
☸ From his living conditions (flat or no, large or small salary, etc.).
☸ With all his hobbies and hobbies.
☸ With all of his views on life. Always waiting, when it will change. Start making more stops depend on the opinions of mothers and friends will start to finally think of God ... .. so hard to accept that he has not changed. But then perhaps respect. When I look at my husband and said to him: "Yes." Completely, without exception, I say "yes" to him, and all that is connected with it. This humility. Humility is the fact that we will not have my apartment, and we will not ride in the luxury hotels on vacation. Humility is the fact that he will not walk with the children and take them out of the garden. Humility is the fact that he will not go to a psychologist to solve family problems. Humility is the fact that it will always be so, as it is now.
There is a saying on this subject: "Man, when married, asks only one thing:" Let it remain so forever. " But it is changing. A woman getting married, hoping that he will change. But it does not change. "It is the nature, and we can not argue with her. Woman changeable as the weather, the wind, like a feather. It changes the mood, thoughts, attitudes. Man is stable, like a wall, like a rock, like a huge locomotive. He sticks one views life. When we ask him to change, we actually ask him to become a woman.
Change your nature, to rebuild its molecular bonds and turn from granite in clay. The man - it's like a car. He will take to the right place. If we accept that we were going to "Zhiguli" and not on "Mercedes" - that's good. This is to avoid unrealistic expectations from the trip. And then you can enjoy the fellowship, the view from the windows and the very fact of movement. And if you sit and think, that in the "Mercedes" has air conditioning and heater, and even a music player and it looks more prestigious, the pleasure of the trip will not be any.
The question is, why do I have a "Zhiguli" and a neighbor - "BMW "- a little bit of something else. If you are already going to the "Lada", then you need to respect that, on what you're going. Because you're very much a year ago, I decided that this car will go on. Surely not just because, but because you have something in it hooked something in you 'missed a bit. " So, it is not so hopeless. The second myth: "Have respect for my husband does not change anything in my life." On the basis of the Vedic concept, which is very close to me, and in common with the majority of cultures and religions, the man - the head. This means that what he does and how he does it, depends on the welfare of the whole family. And then he clarifies that the woman - neck. And she turns the head. She chooses where to head and what looks creates. This role is very important - you will turn in the wrong direction and instead of a flower bed, you can come to the barn. And if you will "move your head back and forth," you can not walk anywhere, and even seasick. If a man - a car, then the energy of women - is fuel. If we do not fill the car, she would not go. In addition, it is very important what we refuel it. It can be diluted and of poor quality. And then it will be bad to go and break quickly. A possible good that will give more power and less problems. Our attitude to her husband - is its fuel. And the best of all possible - is respect.
When the wife respects her husband, their lives transformed:
☸ It will automatically begin to respect all around.
☸ As a consequence, he is offered a good job or collaboration.
☸ There are good friends to help in difficult times.
☸ The family is easier to come to the money, and more . And it happens by itself. This is something that a woman can really change in his family life. This is the way how to influence her husband and his earnings. Start respect him. There is another characteristic of the fuel - is loyalty. This is a very big subject, and I want to talk to her the next time.
Myth Three: "I'll manage without him!" So now popular idea of independence, self-sufficiency. Women aspire to make a career, do not sit in the decree, in order not to lose the place, trying to earn more than her husband. Moreover, the parents of girls seek by all means give them a "proper education". They think that getting a good profession, my daughter will be happy. Will provide itself, and then who knows what. And, indeed, "who knows what" happens more often. Families break up, the girls stay with children in their arms - and that knowledge comes in handy. It seems to be all right. But ... Why break up a family? The reasons are many, but there is, in my opinion, the key. We, the women raised as males. We are taught not how to be a woman. Do not learn to care for others. Not taught to create the atmosphere and comfort of home. Do not teach children to educate. Moreover, examples of our mothers are not always positive.
Many mothers raise their children themselves. And daughter saw that her mother - a strong. And I respect her for that. So what that next to no man - but my mother so dear! Returning to the car category, the car you need to drive far and fast? Quality MOT. Change the oil, pump up the tires, camber-toe ... It's taking care of him. And this is also our function. We women are created in order to take care of others. Particularly about men. Feed, clothe, soothe talk, sew up the hole in the pants ... My mom did not attract me to housework. She did not teach me how to cook, sew, take care of themselves. I myself did not show interest. I did not realize that it is important and necessary. At school I had 2 hours of lessons a week of work. Where we had to learn to sew and cook. But most of all we were doing lessons.
Mathematics, physics, foreign language. What exactly is useful in life. After high school, I did not come to where my heart is torn (it was already psihfak), and where can I get more popular and highly paid professions - matfak. It is clear that there we only studied integrals and programming. And not what is to hang curtains in the kitchen, or what games to play with godovasikom. And married, I was confused. We moved to an empty apartment - and I did not know what to do with it. What should be the blind, why do we need these tablecloths are generally nagladit these arrows on the trousers of her husband, why do we need so much in the kitchen with a knife, what to cook, except for mashed potatoes and ... ing. I now understand that I was not able to do.
The fact that a woman should be able to. And so far I do not know how much. Until now, cooking for me - flour. Just because I'm little cook. It is a great austerity in the button sewing and stitching holes. I hate cleaning the house, always forget to water the flowers, dust. I know very few children's games and poetry - though I have two children .... I am learning to be a woman, learn to cook, sew, sort laundry, tell tales. How difficult to learn this almost thirty years, and how it would be natural in 5-7 years! It turns out that women do not learn the most important thing - to be the heart of the family, to be a reliable rear. And when a family has no heart, it does not have a chance. In the Vedic canon, the woman in the life of all the benefits received by the man. Of course, she can make herself an apartment, a car and a dacha.
But there are many pitfalls:
☸ She can not get everything she wants in this way. Receiving the material well-being, she refuses to family happiness - because there is no time to communicate with the children and her husband. It spoils the relationship between the spouses - if the second half of the general will.
☸ It produces a masculine traits that affect her hormones - begin women's diseases. It also affects the way a man will be there. If a woman becomes a man, the men have to be a Baba. And then it is useless to try to change this "mattress". He can not be a man, because the man's place is already occupied (by the way, I am faced with the fact that the man away from a woman, and is feminine. And then begins to make a lot of money realized in the men's field, and the first wife is still in shock - why me, it was a rag ?!)
☸ It does not get happy - and this is probably the key point. Myth Four: "Let the first he respects me, and then I thought," You can not change another person - we did all know that. You should begin with themselves. If I respect my husband to meet their female functions, fully accept it the way it was created by God - he has no other way but to respond respectfully to respect. And the most important thing. How to respect a man? What does this mean in practice?
☸ As I said, it's full acceptance of it and all that it involves. This is the foundation without which all else is simply impossible.
☸ It is very important to win a desire to improve her own husband. For women it is very difficult. Always see what can be "polished».
☸ Stop cycle on its shortcomings. If you take them, you stop paying attention when he again throwing socks around the room. And instead of screaming, "You opyayayayayayat ???? I govorilaaaa !!!! ", you gently say," Honey, pick up the socks, please. " And he picks them.
☸ begin to see the good in her husband. When we chose it, we saw it as his strengths. Then we begin to become impudent, and this is becoming the norm. Well, yes, wearing flowers once a week, but so what? Well, it earns enough so that I could not work, and it is - a feat that it? Well, walk with your child - because after all it is a common! And so on. But if you think about it, perhaps all this is not important and worthy of respect? Just start to record its strengths in a notebook. Think of all the things that he does for you and for the family, everything that made sometime. And add to the list. Then you can see it with different eyes. You can understand with what a wonderful person you live. Always and everyone can find strengths. You just need to move the grievances and complaints - and remember
☸ Again, it is very important to learn to disagree with him. Listen to all the things that he says - and disagree. It is not necessary to do so, he says. It is important for him to feel that you agree with him. Wife - the closest friend of the heart of men. Only in such a relationship is born a true love. If the husband does not tell his wife anything, because she does not understand him and condemned, he will find other "ears". And then these "ears" can then become a second wife. For me, this topic is very relevant and sufficiently hard at work. But this is what gives the fruit in my family. That it helps in times of crisis. That's why I was so anxious to share it. I wish you a pleasant journey in your favorite car - with excellent fuel Remarkably - and let the road waiting for you only a pleasant experience!
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